22 Jun That alone is enough
It was so profound. So vivid. I knew that moment only belonged to me and my Beloved.
It was on a Saturday. I had finished my second therapy appointment, and I was already emotionally exhausted. My spiritual director and I were scheduled to meet after morning mass, and I was already dreading bearing my soul once again. I came early, as per usual, and found a seat that allowed me to look at Jesus on the Cross directly.
Recently, I started a practice where I focused on the crucifix during mass. Of course, I was still paying attention to what was happening in front of me but I wanted to be able to see Him at all times. It wasn’t a conscious choice, but something that I started when I started whenever I found myself getting distracted. Looking at Jesus during mass centered me.
Slowly and surely, I found peace during mass. The moment when the priest lifts my Beloved is always my favourite part. My mom once told me to make a wish whenever I witnessed it, but instead, I just looked at Him. As I stared at the Cross once again, it felt like we were the only ones in the room. I couldn’t explain it, friend, even if I tried.
Everyone else disappeared from my peripheral vision, and it was just me and Him.
So, I asked Him a question, “Lord, is there all there is? Just you and I, together?”
He surprised me by answering with only four words that comforted my heart.
He said, “That alone is enough”.
I once heard that Jesus pursues us as a lover. I never truly understood what that meant until this moment.
I’ve had experiences here and there, but nothing as intimate as this. Jesus spoke to me, in words that only He and I would understand. He whispered so tenderly and reassured me that this was all I needed.
In that encounter, I understood what it meant to be loved by another. To be wanted fully not because of what I could do or offer, but simply because He is. That was all He said to me and then, everyone else came back in my vision.
That moment solely belonged to Him and I alone.
It felt like a secret only two lovers could have. Gosh, my heart flutters just thinking about it.
My Jesus, my lover. Thank you for pursuing me and my heart continually.